Reality shows are all the rage these days, and we haven’t
been able to get on any of them. We feel left out. It’s so unfair! We want to be
in a reality show. Let’s recap the year and see if we can fit in with one of
these entertainment gems.
- Survivor – Barry finished his four-year council term
by running a campaign against a fellow incumbent. You can see the carnage
for yourself at www.savelomita.org.
- Pawn Stars – Well, we did buy yet another old
- Dinner Impossible – That’s pretty much every night.
“The challenge: will the boys have eaten the ingredients before the parents
- Amazing Race – The goal is to see if Alex can get all
his college applications done Thanksgiving weekend without having to stay up
all night. The roadblock is a surprise snow storm at the cabin. Makes for a
fun ride down the mountain.
- Nanny 911 – Uncle Mark “babysat” while Margie and
Barry took a trip to Boston.
- 18 Kids and Counting – Sorry, those people are just
- American Idol – Forget the judges, Alex and David are
in the LA All City Band again with 350 of their closest friends. They’ll be
in the front row as the band marches in the Rose Parade on New Year’s Day.
- One Big Happy Family – To show how tough we are, we
had a Waite Family reunion and a Hayes family reunion in the same week
almost a thousand miles apart. Both were a lot of fun. No, we mean it!
- Ace of Cakes – Well, we did have really good scones at
the reunion. Those are sort of like little cakes, aren’t they?
- Little People, Big World – Since Alex is over 6’ tall
and David is approaching that, we’re just too big.
- Extreme Makeover Home Edition – We put a new exhaust
fan in the bathroom, does that count?
- The Dog Whisperer – Monster is now 14 years old and
goes through over $300 a month in heart medicine. Woof!
- Dancing with the Stars – hmm… We don’t dance.
- What Not to Wear – David paints shirts, but they are
cool and don’t belong in the “not to wear” list.
- Myth Busters – How do you get skunk smell off a dog?
Nicks gave us three chances over just a few weeks to find out. It’s no myth,
we confirmed that Nicks is truly stupid.
- The Apprentice – The summer youth program at Barry’s
office got 180 kids jobs thanks to federal stimulus funds. Yes, your tax
dollars actually did something useful.
- Fear Factor – Alex got his driver’s license while
David got his learner’s permit. We fear our insurance bill.
- Pimp My Ride – Thanks to “cash for clunkers,” Barry
finally got rid of his 1991 Explorer.
- Wife Swap – Forget that, why would we swap? Barry asks
nervously as Margie looks over his shoulder. Moving right along…
- Disaster House – We hired a cleaning lady since there
is no way Barry and the boys are going to overcome their slovenly ways.
Margie still expects them to clean up after themselves. Can you imagine?
On second thought, we seem to have plenty of reality as it
is. Hey, maybe we could be on a game show: “Look at all these fabulous prizes
just waiting to be won…”
As always, we’d love to hear from you, whatever version of
reality you choose to participate in. Drop us a
firstname.lastname@example.org, 310 325-6389 or 25041 Feijoa Ave., Lomita, CA 90717.
Have your people call our people. We’ll do lunch.
our neighbor Tom show off our snow people that David and our friend
cleaned, polished, and ready for the prom. How many people can fit in
session at the Hayes Family reunion. Loud can be a very good thing if
and Barry enjoy a ride on Casey Junior at Disneyland while the kids are
stuck at school. Such mean parents. Can you imagine?